Friday, October 22, 2004


What is the criterion of testing someone? a person may seem honest, but is he really so? Think again! Are you reaching the right conclusion about that person's personality? Is all the love you're offering to that person worth him/her?
Some people are hard to open up; you never know what lies in their hearts. And then there are some people who never understand us. And then again, there are some people who are impossible for you to forget. you may not love them, you only care about them, but when they’re not there, you keep on remembering them, and then there are times, when you know that they are in distress and you're unable to do anything, and you feel helpless and despite wanting to share their feelings and be able to talk to them, you are left in your own world of thoughts, which upset you no end. And then you start to feel, if they are really worth all your worries, and then at times you feel as if you're not being totally honest yourself.
What to do in situations like these? The only solution, in my eyes, is to be honest to at least your own self. It’ll become much easier then, to be honest with others. Everything will become crystal clear, like a pool of clean, clear water, in which one can see, oneself.
That’s the only way to live a life without distress. Let’s all of us be honest to our own selves, and accept the truth of what we are, and where we stand!
And being totally honest at the moment, I want to confess, that I’ve been time and again, been, extremely rude to many people, and I have hurt many people in my life in every way possible. and I want to take this opportunity to say to those whom I’ve hurt that:
"I’m really very sorry, and, I hope that you can forgive me for whatever I have done, or said to you but I can assure you that, not once, I have intentionally tried to hurt you, or your feelings and I hope that you do understand that and are able to forget it all, leaving no breach in our friendship"

Tuesday, October 19, 2004


1- Some people are like wind; they enter our lives quietly and quietly take your life away.
2- Some people are like homes, no matter how far they are, the heart yearns to be taken in them and live there forever.
3- Some prayers are uncontrollable, suddenly starting to ring in the innermost temples of our hearts without our knowledge.
4- Some hearts are very sensitive, test their strength before using words on them, if not, then, either the heart will break, or you will
5- Those people, who have beautiful memories, are never alone.
6- If you see someone in distress, take a lesson
7- Welcome adversity with a smile, it will make you stronger
8- If someone trusts you, then live up to the trust
9- If you like to succeed in life: be as sweet as honey, be as fresh as a rose, be as regular as a clock, and be sure as death
10- The unreasonable man adapts himself to the world, the unreasonable world persists in trying to adapt the world to himself, therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man
11- Only those who dare to fall greatly can achieve greatly.
12- Enlightenment must come little by little, otherwise it will overwhelm us
13- What you achieve through the journey of life is no as important as who you become
14- The journey is the reward
15- Life is not a definite station, it’s just a path
16- For every person who climbs the ladder, there are a dozen waiting for the elevator
17- Pearls lie not on the sea shore, if thou desirest one, thou must dive for it
18- The grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.
19- If there are misunderstandings in love, straighten them out, for love gets mad with the belief of being cajoled.
20-Love can never be with a face, it is only when you haven fallen for a heart, a soul, for faces fade away, faces can be alike, but the heart and soul are always special.

Monday, October 18, 2004


A cousin of mine recently narrated a story to me:
"A man, who was a criminal, was to be executed. He had twin brother, who was the justice of peace.
Before he was hanged, a last interview, of the two brothers was taken separately, and the same question was asked.
'Why did you become, what you are today?'
Both the brothers answered the same answer:
'With a father like that, what else could have i become!'
Their father was a CRIMINAL, and had been hanged to death as well.

i truly believe in the moral of this story.” it’s us who make the society, and not the society who makes us" and those who believe other wise are on the wrong path, in my eyes.
I’ve often found people blaming others for their own misfortunes, making excuses, for coming late, not doing a particularly important work, blaming others in a fight or in an argument, and not one of them ready to accept his/her own faults.
how often we hear the likes of:” it was his/her fault..........." or it was because she/he................" and how less we hear these:"it was because I.................." and even less often,” it was ENTIRELY MY fault.............."
though it's very difficult to accept your own fault, but you will find, that in the long run, people who admit to their own mistakes, find flaws in themselves, and then do not just forget about it, but try to improve themselves, and despite feeling ashamed of themselves, never feel ashamed of their won existence, and have the power to believe and pursue, are the ones, who EXCEL.
the ones, who blame others for molding them into what they are, who feel embarrassed of their own selves, but are not ashamed of what they are doing, are the LOSERS of the society.
Keeping a positive approach and looking at both sides of the picture, and then deciding for the brighter one, is, i feel, the KEY TO SUCCESS.

Monday, October 11, 2004


I can’t write! I don’t know what to write1 there so much going is on in my brain, but I don’t know how to put it into words, to make it understandable for others. It is as if a blabbering is going on ………. And then it is as if I have nothing in my head, no thoughts, no feelings, nothing, just a numbness, a tiredness, as if I’ve walked and walked in a desert for ages and have had no interaction with anyone, and, suddenly, I’m a part of a crowd, or is it the other way round? Have I been living in a crowd, or maybe a mob, and suddenly, I’m standing in a desert, all alone, and can think of nothing!
I don; know if all this is even making any sense or not! I guess not! I can’t even understand why I’m writing all this! Have I gone insane? Or have I turned feeling less insensitive all of a sudden? Or was I that way before now? I don’t feel human! Why do I feel like this???????????


He is there! Just around the corner, she has to go on, a few more steps and they’ll be one. He’s waiting. He’s tired, he has walked miles and miles, while she had stayed. She’d been stationary, even repulsive, but he had persevered. He had made every effort, overcame every obstacle, fought her repulsions, but he’s left those last few steps to her. He’d crossed all those paths, he took all the difficulties and burdens unto himself. But he’s left the plain few steps to her. He could have walked them as well, but he is a man, and he has to save his pride, and why not? He’s done so much, even waited after reaching that corner to let her make up her mind, waited in apprehension , whether she’ll honour or reject, and all he asks for, now, is to be sure of her love as well. But at last his misery has touched her heart, and she’s ready to walk upto him, and she hopes it isn’t so late yet. He’s waiting in anticipation. It seems as if he’s ready to leave his place, and come running to take her in his arms.
But ………………………………. What’s this? Gosh! She’s run right into a glass wall. He’s right across it. Oh God! She can’t pass through it, neither can he. He’s trying to break through it, she’s making her own efforts.
What is this image being formed on her side. It’s some one they don’t know. A hand appears and takes hold of her hand. It takes her away, though she fought and cried, while he tried to get to her side to try and save her. But …….. the image has turned into a reality of the present, while the reality of HIM, has become an image of the past. They’re seperated .. FOREVER!.
Whose fault is it? Hers, who had been so late in making up her mind? His, who had waited for her to take the last steps? Or of those people, who supposedly govern our lives and make decisions for us, regardless of our wishes and hopes, and we have to obey them because of the attached strings of values, emotions, and so called prestige? Who is answerable for the lost happiness of two living souls, now dead without each other?


Living in dreamland isn’t easy! The reality is very cruel, it keeps on harshly reminding you that it is there. Always and forever!
The dreams keep on being inerupted and no matter how hard you may try to persevere, it’s charm is finally broken. You give yourself up to the claws of reality abd no matter how much it hurts, your heart knows that there wasn’t any chance anyway of your being able to live in that dreamworld. The dreams go away, the heart is broken and you are torn between your desire and hpe to go back into that world and the strings that keep you pulling back into the real world. Then, you start a mission to make your dreams come into reality, but the world doesn’t like it, it shows it’s true colours to you. It had been torn away from its dreams, now it doesn’t want anyone else to succeed. It has forgotten its own misery, it is only envious, rather jealous,it can not see anyne smile because it, itself is in tears. And so the story ends……………… like many others!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, October 08, 2004


We are all aware of the fact; that man has come a far way from the point of his origin. He has advanced in fields which were once not even imaginable. Yet, aside from the wonders which he has conquered, we cannot ignore the ever so growing “DARK SIDE” of this glimmer.
It is becoming harder to survive, day by day, in this constantly modifying society. Our homes have themselves become the site of hardships. From this, a wise man could only deduct, that despite the journey he has made, man has lost things more important than those he has won over the centuries,.
Surely, the true essence of our creation speaks of us to be the humble union of body and soul. However, we deny the fragility of the soul and compensate this loss with comfort to our greed and pleasure.
The medical profession is no doubt a divine responsibility bestowed upon a selected few of the inhabitants of our land. Tougher, here too, can we observe an imbalance between the relationship of the ill and the messiah. An error based on the perversion of concepts and misleading prospects. It is a well known fact, that to heal the body, it is best, that the soul must be at ease. And so, comes in the purpose of our project. “PHP”
Our goal is to light the fire of friendship between the patients, doctors and nurses, to create a better environment for bilateral satisfaction.

What is PHP?

PHP stands for “People Helping People”.
PHP is a project initiated for improving the standard of medical ethics in developing countries with special focus on the subcontinent.
PHP is a project envisaged by doctors themselves, for the patients they serve.
PHP is a dream emerging from within the medical fraternity.

What is the Modus Operandi of PHP?

Unfortunately, instead of those who are responsible, it is people from the private sector who have been doing all the reformation work in the medical world. We on the other hand, want to ensure, the accountability of those who are playing a key role in our community viz.doctors, nurses, patients etc.

PHP aims at giving patients hope to live by adopting a different approach – a more humane, people oriented approach in line with ideal medical ethics standards, keeping in mind the problems the doctors and nurses have to face while providing aid and health to others.

What is the objective of PHP?

PHP aims at:
§ Identifying and attacking the underlying root causes for the declining standards of medical ethics in the subcontinent
§ Identifying erroneous medical practices which have been in vogue for ages but which urgently require change
§ Creating a forum for bringing together the people who are actually responsible for reformation of the medical fraternity
§ Helping them become accountable by pointing out to them what the wrong practices are, instead of bringing them to task
§ Aiding them develop and implement a road-map to achieve this change

What are the bottlenecks to the success of PHP?

The primary impediment to the success of PHP, which is also the fundamental reason for the rapidly plummeting standards of medical ethics worldwide, is the multitude of troubles and problems which doctors and nurses face.

PHP can be sustainable and successful only if these issues are recognized and resolved before the medical fraternity is asked to change their attitude.

What are the problems faced by doctors and paramedical staff?

1. Low income: The first problem is INCOME. This is essential for them to properly fulfill their responsibilities and ensure their basic survival. Because of a multitude of factors, doctors and paramedical staff start earning properly only after they attain the age of 30 – 35. Until then, their pay is abysmally low. And even after that it is only the doctors, who earn properly, and not the nurses and the paramedics.
2. Hectic and stressful lifestyle: The next is their hectic schedule and lifestyle. As a second year medical student, we haven’t even started on our medical rounds, and yet it is almost impossible for us to complete our studies properly. And our social lives are already zero. No wonder our fellow students tell us to stop this project, which they feel is a “crazy waste of precious time”. It is no fault of theirs; our inhumanly difficult lifestyle often prohibits us doctors from having the time to pause, and think, and feel. But we as a fraternity MUST recognize the importance of this project; of living up to the ideals of the Hippocratic Oath; of becoming doctors with compassion, not just doctors with skill. We must realize that, once we enter this hallowed profession, it will herald the end of our personal comforts, of our social lives. It is unfortunate but that is how we see it. We would dearly love to be proved wrong by you.
3. Other problems: Enclosed in the comfort of our homes, we doctors, nurses and paramedics often forget that we would not only come across disease and physical suffering in the hospitals for which we are aptly trained, but countless other, often ignored, factors as well, which in turn are causing pollution, and are making it difficult for the medical practitioners to work with ease.
a. Sexual harassment: Even in these times, when medical profession is said to be totally crowded by the female members of the society, lady doctors, young medical students and nurses going on rounds are not safe from the remarks and stares of patients and their family members, which puts them off, immediately, and does not allow them to do their jobs properly.
b. Illiteracy and pollution: A casual walk around the corridors of Civil Hospital during OPD timings and even through the wards will show food wrappers and packages on the ground, dirty finger marks on the walls, families squatting on the floor eating and throwing food and their small children performing their private jobs under the nearest bush. In the wards these same families are trying to feed their patients with their unwashed hands, and having lead a difficult, poverty stricken life, and in an attempt to save the lives of their loved ones, they are often found asking the doctors and nurses to financially help them, which causes the practitioners to run away from their vicinity. Also the language barrier is a big problem in the doctor patient relationship.
The environments of the hospitals, themselves, are very depressing, with illness all around and death a common sight, loads of students do not know how to handle the situation, and most of the doctors having got used to, remain unmoved by, it.

For any conscientious medical student or doctor, the only possible reaction is to try and put an end to all this. Yet, in our determination to achieve this desired goal we often choose the most obvious path, viz. get the sweepers to pick up the trash; send the poor families with the children out of the hospital while allowing only one person to stay back; insisting that patients in the OPD and the attendants in the ward use the bathrooms correctly and leave it neat and clean. All this having been done, have we really solved our problems? Is that pleased and satisfied smile that spreads over our faces justified?

On the face of it -- Yes.

After a second closer look -- No!

The OPD area would be clean but it would also be barren. The lack of attendants looking after their own patients would result in many patients lying alone in bed suffering terribly from loneliness and depression and being unable to call for a doctor when they need one.

Our determined conscientious doctor would then start on a mission of looking after the patients in the wards. the number of staff on duty would be increased so that each patient can ring for medical help whenever needed. The sweepers and other menial staff would have to clean the corridors every hour. The medical students would be assigned to go down and talk to the patients after classes.

are unfortunately high that all this may not work. Many such proposals are shot down by the hospital administration due to lack of governmental funds. The medical students would find reasons to disappear for long hours in order to do their own studies, the excess staff would spend their time talking at the desk or resting after doing an exhausting night duty at someone’s house as a private attendant and the sweepers would be found complaining and cursing the patients and their families for being unclean.

People prefer to suffer illnesses at home or go to expensive clinics they can ill afford, rather than leave their children uncared for at-home when visiting the hospital for their own treatment. They would hence invariably bring their children along with them to the hospital.

So is this the end of the story for our conscientious doctor? Will things soon slide back to their original conditions? Possibly yes, because he tried to remove the effect rather than the underlying root causes of the pollution, dirt and filth.
The main cause for all these problems is illiteracy on the part of patients.

If the patients are given a pictorial walk-through, or given a gentle talk by an impressive looking doctor, they would learn to keep the hospital as clean as their own homes. In addition, large dustbins at every corner would make disposal of wrappers easy. Rows of public toilets would make it convenient to use them rather than the plants growing in the hospital grounds. Awarding and keeping incentives for good service, getting the staff on duty to ask the patients, to keep themselves and their surroundings clean, and pointing people out as soon as they litter, would ensure cleanliness in the hospital wards and grounds with less burden on sweepers. Providing soap as only liquid soap which falls down drop-wise would ensure that attendants keep their hands clean. An increase in the salary of the staff would greatly reduce their need to do private jobs after regular hours and would make them more attentive to the needs of the patients at hand.

What is the result of these problems?

Due to these unfortunate constraints which the medical fraternity operates within, there is a resultant systemic breakdown in doctor-patient interactions. Doctors have become less attentive, suffer from poor time management skills and hence are usually never on schedule, are always stressed out and often rude and repulsive, and suffer from a misguided sense of superiority.

What role will PHP play here?

PHP will attack the problem in three ways:
§ Conduct workshops for doctors, nurses and paramedical staff. These workshops will focus on the softer aspects of the profession, and of the importance of viewing a patient as a human being and not just as a sick body or a source of income.
§ Conduct individual one-on-one counseling sessions for doctors, nurses and paramedical staff
§ Work with regulators and hospital administrators to obtain their buy-in and improve the rules and functioning in line with humanitarian ethical standards
§ Collect funds to supply the dustbins, build public toilets, awards for different wards, and removing other complaints that we may come across.

What steps have already been taken by PHP so far?

§ Work on medical ethics and doctors', nurses' and patients' relationships has commenced.
§ PHP is going to start by teaching the outgoing (final year) batches of medical students from this year, so that the new batch of doctors is trained in medical ethics.
§ A PATIENTS' SATISFACTION SCORE, DOCTORS’ SATISFACTION SCORE, AND NURSES’ SATISFACTION SCORE have been developed. This will aid us in evaluating our work, measuring the results we have achieved, and making appropriate changes in our policies and methodology.
§ If the results are measurable and positive, we will continue with teaching other students, doctors and nurses.
§ We will also start cleanliness drives for hospitals, nursing homes and clinics.
§ At a later stage, we will expand our horizons to beyond the medical fraternity, and will begin training people how they can keep themselves healthy with just a little effort.

What does PHP need?

§ PHP needs funds for its manpower and training workshops
§ PHP needs people to help with research work. Specifically on developing the material for the workshops and the process for the workshops. Do you know people who can help? They could be doctors, managers, experienced public speakers or comperes, or even actors or writers
§ PHP needs volunteers from every city and every country where the quality of medical standards is low and needs urgent improvement

What role can you play here?

For PHP, the role played by non-medical people will be as critical as that played by the medical fraternity.

§ You can help by spreading news of PHP to all your relatives, friends, acquaintances, colleges, universities, or any organizations or sources of funds you know. Please ask them contact us, so we can build up a database of potential volunteers who we will contact as soon as the project kicks off. We promise to revert as soon as possible.
§ As a layman, your inputs regarding the areas of weakness within the medical fraternity will be very important for us to design an improvement strategy. Your observations, feedback and ideas will be very helpful. Please contact us with any suggestions you may have. We promise that every idea will be considered carefully. Our email address is given below:

Are we the only ones wanting to help and bring about this revolution?

We would like to add here, that, all is not lost. We are not alone. The hospital administration is as keen as ourselves to bring about the change, and the dietary conditions, as we have ourselves observed and found, are better than private hospitals, and there have been many major changes that have been made in many wards and overall in the hospital. And we are, therefore, sure of their assistance and approval, and continuation and survival of our plans and project.

Come join us. Join the PHP. Be a part of the medical revolution. Help us make a difference.

And see the heartwarming results in the sunny smiles of happy patients.


Wednesday, October 06, 2004

tum mujhko acchay lagtay ho

i was just going through my college diary, and came through this poem we used to read a lot at college, a small but very nicely written poem...... here it goes,
ik baat kahoon gar suntey ho,
tum mujh ko achchay lagtey ho,
kuch chanchal sey,kuch chup chup se,
kuch pagal, pagal, lagtey ho,
ik baat kahoon ger suntey ho,
tum mujhko achchay lagtey ho,

ye baat baat per kho jana,
kuch kehtey kehtey ruk jana,
ye kis uljhan main lagtey ho,
ik baat kahoon ger suntey ho,
tum mujh ko achchay lagtey ho,

hain chahney waley aur bahut,
per tum main hai ik baat bahut,
kuch apney apney lagtey ho,
ik baat kahoon ger suntay ho,
tum mujhko achchay lagtey ho,
ik baat kahoon ger suntay ho,
tum mujhko acchay lagtey ho.


Why do some words, some old times, some bygone moments, knock at our memory and, suddenly out of nowhere, we become engrossed in those moments, those times, that have, though passed away, but, have left, inerasable marks, on our memory and in our hearts.
Some of these are those that we have actually buried deep down into the darkest corners and somehow, they remain there like dying flames, but never die, and on the slightest show of warmth, they burst out, like a great fire, threatening to engulf and destroy everything that comes in its way! But somehow, nothing even happens to us, no matter how much this fire burns us up from inside, we live on, just like this fire had lived on in those dark corners.
We feel like we're breaking down, we feel as if everything is incomplete, as if life won't go on without a repetition of those moments, or without certain things or people, being there in our lives, but nothing happens! Life goes on, and so do we! We burry those memories, yet again, recollect ourselves, put a smile on our faces, and the life takes one turn after another, until we realize that," the things that have not been written in our destiny, we'll never have them, and so why cry!"

Araaish-e-khayal bhi ho, dil kusha bhi ho
wo dard ab kahan, jisey ji chahta bhi ho.
ye ia roz ik saa gham ik si umeed,
is gham-e-bekhumaar ki ab inteha bhi ho.

Monday, October 04, 2004


When your heart is wounded, your eyes don’t cry, they just loose their shine.When you have a shattered soul, your lips don’t move to say anything, they just loose the speech.When your emotions have been drained, your laugh isn’t lost; it just looses its mirth.When your feelings have been used, your life doesn’t end; it just looses its meaning.Life isn’t a bed of roses, it has its thorns already, and it isn’t necessary for others to throw their own in the way of others. If each one of us has the courage to bear our own thorns, then life would become easier for all, but there isn’t a shortage of people, who love to make it more and more difficult for others to live, but in the process they make their own life, uncomfortable and unbearable too, though they hardly realize it, because they're cowards and like to put the blame of their cowardice on others.It’s useless trying to change such cowards, they have passed the stage of metamorphosis, they won’t change, because they think they’re the best, they’re the sufferers of some sort of a complex! Leave them, before their stinging life, merges with yours, and your life becomes a story of silent tears, lonely sighs, mounting fears and lost hope, slowly poisoning your happiness and tearing away each smile that may be left in your life.Just tear away such thorns and let them find their own way, if they are not ready to become flowers. For maybe after being crushed under the feet of passers by, they may also become softer, their juice may be released this way, and they may stop making life miserable for others…… who knows, some people are born to learn the hard way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But now look at this side of the picture…… the times when:Some things never seem to leave you alone. The more you try to evade them, the more they chase.Some times, when the life comes as a task……….one after the other, endless, and forever chasing.Some moments, some days, some years, that become too exhausting, too tiring, extracting everything out of you.Some people, then alongside all this try to take everything out of your hands, wanting to rule, wanting to be the in charge of your life.Then at times like these,
Some words of love,
Some deeds of kindness,
Some tears of understanding,
Some smiles of hope,
Some looks of tenderness, And
Some people full of care, full of life, and full of blessings for you, despite their own troubles, touch your soul, passing their warmth to your hearts, making your life easier, better and much more bearable.
Cheers to such people, all the best to their efforts and every good wish right from the heart to their spirits. here we are bound to tell them that we love them for whatever they’ve done for us, the way they’ve reformed our lives, and the way the thoughts of them make us more human, more hopeful, creating a positive approach in our hearts towards life and giving us a renewed energy to live on!!